i love my weekly four hour drive ...

• music from my iPod playing over the stereo
• singing along at the top of my lungs (...playing "air bass" against the steering wheel)
• a large Tim Horton’s coffee; two cream, three sugar
• mary, jane
• cruise control set to 129 (... cruisin’)
• the open sky
• the open road
• beautiful rural ontario rolling past me
• listening
• thinking
• the point-of-focus meditation (...the road)
• recording my thoughts and ideas (...by leaving voicemail messages for myself and my friends)

nephrite

she arrived from the studio baring gifts ...

... banana bread that she had lovingly baked for us... (“it’s the worst i’ve ever made ... it’s burnt!”) ... it was delicious of course ...

... some organic moisturizing cream which she had fashioned herself from purest ingredients ... she explained the process to me as i mixed her a drink ...

... and a cute little ‘low-maintenance’ plant for my otherwise lifeless basement apartment ... more precisely: a bamboo shoot, harvested from the plant in her own bedroom, sitting in a small, blue, water-filled Bombay Gin bottle ... the one we had drunk from on our first night together ...

... ah me!

alexander, our older brother, set off for a great adventure ...

... the alexander technique helps you make the most efficient use of your body's energy, in a world of gravity and stress ...

how should i pray...?

i want to channel my energy and possitivity to others, with intent, and ask that they be relieved of their pain ... i want to pray for them, but i haven't figured out how i can best do this ... yes, i am able to focus my mind on them; my heart, my self ... and feel compassion ...
... but before i go to sleep at night, i want to say goodnight to the people that i have collected in my heart that day, and ask the universe to please take care of them for a bit ...

... how do you pray..tell..?

smashing pumpkins fans

... i recently noticed something :

... the pumpkins' first CD of b-sides was Pisces Iscariot ... their last CD of 'b-sides' was the bonus disc that came with Rotten Apples, Judas 0 [the slash through the circle on the cd indicates that this is a zero, not an O as i've always heard it pronounced ... but hey, we do that with phone number zeros as well ...]

... Billy is a Pisces (of course ... ), and the main 'character' in his songs is a man named Zero ... maybe you noticed the shirt ... or listened to the lyrics of the song ... you can listen to Machina for his story ... then the rest of the albums for his full story ... or look on my wall sometime and ask me what that little girl is doing on that praying guy's head ... but i digress ...

... the twelth aspostle was Judas, the guy who betrayed Jesus and turned him in to the authorities in Jerusalem ... but what i just noticed in this online bible is that Judas is actually called Judas Iscariot! maybe everyone knows that, but it didn't ... the annotated version of the bible also has the following footnote:

Iscariot: ... means "a man who was a liar"

... so, some fun facts ... ... the pumpkins' first and last b-sides albums again are ...

Pisces Iscariot
Judas 0 [zero]

...

happy easter!

check out the bunny suicides!! hilarious

Catch-22

Everyone knows the expression "Catch-22", and some of you will even know that it comes from a book of the same name (which I'm currently reading ... and it's fabulous!) Here's a excerpt from the book which explains :

"'Is Orr crazy?'
'He sure is,' Doc Daneeka said.
'Can you ground him?'
'I sure can. But first he has to ask me to. That's part of the rule.'
'Then why doesn't he ask you to?'
'Because he's crazy,' Doc Daneeka said. 'He has to be crazy to keep flying combat missions after all the close calls he's had. Sure, I can ground Orr. But first he has to ask me to.'
'That's all he has to do to be grounded?'
'That's all. Let him ask me.'
'And then you can ground him?' Yossarian asked.
'No. Then I can't ground him.'
'You mean there's a catch?'
'Sure there's a catch,' Doc Daneeka replied. 'Catch‑22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.'
There was only one catch and that was Catch‑22, which specified that a concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch‑22 and let out a respectful whistle.
'That's some catch, that Catch‑22,' he observed.
'It's the best there is,' Doc Daneeka agreed."

l'acrobat

...
i must be an acrobat
to talk like this
and act like that
...
i can build
and i can will
and you can call
can't wait until
and i can stash
and you can seize
in dreams begin
responsibilities
and we can love
and we can love
...
[used too]

grandaddy told me...

now that the lake's in place
where the dead sea used to be
it seems that I'm seasoned to be
in a season of the old me
i wouldn't trade my place
i've got no reason to be
weathered and withering
like in a season of the old me

bust the lock off the front door!
once you're outside you won't want to hide anymore
light the light on the front porch!
once it's on you'll never wanna turn it off anymore

~"now it's on", grandaddy

art for art’s sake?

i’ve noticed that when my heart is more open i seem to experience ... i seem to notice ... more confluence ... more co-incidents ...

okay .. i have things to pass on ... information that i’ve gathered and that i know someone of you could use ...

music .. i’m loving it right now ... i’m listening to so many new bands ... and so many of them are so great!! take a listen to

aqueduct .. as close as your girlfriend is far away
grandaddy .. stray dog and the chocolate snake

radio .. CBC radio one (99.1 here) on Sundays ... 12h00 the vinyl café .. brilliant story telling! ... 14h00 tapestry .. a beautiful way to add spirituality back to your sunday ...

reading .. the bible! did you flinch? it’s interesting ... i found a site that has different versions available for reading / listening (mp3) ... i’m reading the contemporary english version for now. matthew's retelling of the story of jesus was good. the Son showed some strange humors which remind you not to take every verse of the book literally ... more on that to come, i’m sure ...

art for art’s sake? .. Archimedes. sand. stick. diagrams. mathematical. problem. abstract. enemy. approach. behind. runs him through with a sword.” art for art’s sake? watch your back. beware of evil intent. fin

la sonrisa inspiradora

inspiring smile
losing expectations
releasing mind
listening heart,,
there is always something hopeful to focus on
always some beauty to be experienced,,
if everything is connected
and there is beauty in the world
then you can always trace your way back
to the outline of a heart

chalkboard #5

the serenity to accept
the things i cannot change
the courage to change
the things i can ...

clarifications:

serenity <=> mind
courage <=> heart

courage <=> self-love <=> self-trust [past & present]

why do i fear judgement?

The Yes Men

What an interesting documentary! Check it out on DVD ...

"The Yes Men are a team of merry pranksters with an agenda. Advocates of gender equality, economic parity and human rights, they've been responsible for such famous stunts as the massive Barbie doll-GI Joe voicebox switch in toy stores during Christmas 1993 and the campaign parody website gwbush.com, which then-candidate George W. famously tried to have shut down because "there ought to be limits to freedom."

This hilarious and eye-opening do-it-yourself documentary follows the exploits of Yes Men Andy Bichlbaum and Mike Bonnano as they travel the globe posing as spokesmen for the World Trade Organization, speaking at economic conferences and making appearances on CNBC -- all the while pretending to espouse (and thereby expose) what they see as the WTO's goals: the exploitation of Third World labor to increase the profits of First World corporations. The funny thing is -- or is it the scary thing? -- their quarry never seem bothered by their innocuously delivered outrageous statements (the Civil War was the "least profitable war in history," and slavery is passé because foreign sweat shop labor is cheaper to maintain), and few even realize they're being set up -- even when the pranks grow exponentially absurd." ~SPLICEDwire mini-review by Rob Blackwelder

i know not what i do

what i do at work: i charge ridiculous fees for my time .... and during this time i read novels that i've pasted into MS Word, surf the net, watch downloaded episodes of my favourite tv shows ... and occasionally work hard and change how multinational corporations do business ...

to many of you this sounds like a dream job ... and i even feel ridiculous complaining about it ... but it's just so surreal! ... this isn't life ... killing time is not living! ... i walk around like a zombie because i spend the entire day immersed in distractions ... and by the end of the day i've forgotten who i am ...

it's amazes me how adaptable human beings are, and how the grass always looks greener on the other side of the valley ... some of you would look at me and think "wow, i would love to have your job and get to fool around on a computer all day", and i look at you and think "wow, i would love to have a job where i get to do some honest work" ...

but what is "honest" work ...

i need to BELIEVE in what i'm doing ... i need to help others ... or at least help myself ...

Then a ploughman said, "Speak to us of Work."
And he answered, saying:
You work that you may keep pace with the earth and the soul of the earth.
For to be idle is to become a stranger unto the seasons, and to step out of life's procession, that marches in majesty and proud submission towards the infinite.
When you work you are a flute through whose heart the whispering of the hours turns to music.
Which of you would be a reed, dumb and silent, when all else sings together in unison?
Always you have been told that work is a curse and labour a misfortune.
But I say to you that when you work you fulfil a part of earth's furthest dream, assigned to you when that dream was born,
And in keeping yourself with labour you are in truth loving life,
And to love life through labour is to be intimate with life's inmost secret.
But if you in your pain call birth an affliction and the support of the flesh a curse written upon your brow, then I answer that naught but the sweat of your brow shall wash away that which is written.
You have been told also life is darkness, and in your weariness you echo what was said by the weary.
And I say that life is indeed darkness save when there is urge,
And all urge is blind save when there is knowledge,
And all knowledge is vain save when there is work,
And all work is empty save when there is love;
And when you work with love you bind yourself to yourself, and to one another, and to God.
And what is it to work with love?
It is to weave the cloth with threads drawn from your heart, even as if your beloved were to wear that cloth.
It is to build a house with affection, even as if your beloved were to dwell in that house.
It is to sow seeds with tenderness and reap the harvest with joy, even as if your beloved were to eat the fruit.
It is to charge all things you fashion with a breath of your own spirit,
And to know that all the blessed dead are standing about you and watching.
Often have I heard you say, as if speaking in sleep, "he who works in marble, and finds the shape of his own soul in the stone, is nobler than he who ploughs the soil.
And he who seizes the rainbow to lay it on a cloth in the likeness of man, is more than he who makes the sandals for our feet."
But I say, not in sleep but in the over-wakefulness of noontide, that the wind speaks not more sweetly to the giant oaks than to the least of all the blades of grass;
And he alone is great who turns the voice of the wind into a song made sweeter by his own loving.
Work is love made visible.
And if you cannot work with love but only with distaste, it is better that you should leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take alms of those who work with joy.
For if you bake bread with indifference, you bake a bitter bread that feeds but half man's hunger.
And if you grudge the crushing of the grapes, your grudge distils a poison in the wine.
And if you sing though as angels, and love not the singing, you muffle man's ears to the voices of the day and the voices of the night.
~Kahlil Gibran, "The Prophet"