current flow ...

the concept of 'money' developed to make it easier for people to trade goods and services ... (e.g. you no longer need find a baker with whom to trade your blacksmith skills in order to eat bread) thus, money helped transactions to flow more easily ... helped them to flow 'like a current', as it were .... is that where the term 'currency' comes from?!

so get this: i was leaving China and wanted to change my leftover RMB (Chinese currency) back to C$ at the airport, since it doesn't seem that their government allows RMB to be traded outside of the country (you always forget these little communist details ... like having to pass through strict customs before you LEAVE the country!) i went up to the exchange booth, put my money in the tray, and said "Canadian dollars please." the woman pointed to a sign: "to exchange Chinese currency, an ATM or bank withdrawal slip is required" You can't change their money unless you can prove that you took it out of a bank!! wassup wit dat?!

I was stuck with a tonne of the the stuff, so i went to duty-free and bought a bottle of Moet. :D

p.s. i'm home, safe and sound! [twitch]

mmm ... bloooooood ....

for lunch today my client took me out to a nice restaurant to try some REAL chinese food ... i sampled lots of great dishes, my favourites being a spicy shrimp deal and a wonderfully flavoured fried eggplant. i also tried 'blood soup with pig entrails'!! (and there's no metaphor in it's name ... it was a pig-blood-based broth with pieces of intestine!!!) a decent flavour, but the entrails were the most slippery thing i've ever had in my mouth!
hey, you gotta try everything once, right?! ;)

fun facts about China ...

- they have strange car brands here ... the Volkswagen “Santana”, the Nissan “Happy” ... and for some reason Buicks are very popular!

- coffee tends to be served pre-mixed with milk and sugar ... a sugar-lover’s nightmare, as they don’t usually have packets of the individual components! luckily for me, the national pallet seems to call for “double-double” (more like “one-and-a-half, one-and-a-half” really) ... imagine Chris giving up coffee?! hehe

- so much outsourced / “overseas’d” manufacturing occurs here! the industrial park where i work has representation from about a hundred members of the Fortune 500 ... and the park didn’t exist five years ago, so much of this is recent! i can see virtually all of the well known high-tech and bio-tech firms during my daily drive here ... and i’m sure the companies that i don’t know are simply suppliers to the multinationals (for example, my client makes phones for Sony-Eriksson, routers for Oracle, etc.) this is because the labour is so cheap, of course. the workers make so little money that there is a big problem with theft. my students tell me that their company had to weld down the sewer grates in the factory because the workers were stealing them to sell as scrap metal ... and the same happens with metal platters from the cafeteria!!

- there are ‘official’ taxis here (after my time in malaysia i keep wanting to spell it ‘teksi’), but there are also many unofficial taxis; people trying to make an extra buck by picking up tourists at the city’s sites. well, i learned last Saturday that taking these is a mistake. i took two that day, and each of the guys tried to sell me ‘additional services’.
two minutes into my first trip, the driver turned around and started making a fist out of his left hand and poking his right index finger in and out of the hole ... trying to sell me a friggin’ prostitute! then he took some strange route through the city, including a short-cut through a really dingy neighbourhood ... i was scared sh*tless that he was going to kidnap me!
there were no taxis outside of my next destination, so i fell for it again and hired a gentle looking older guy to take me back to my hotel. he tried talking to me the entire way ... when i didn’t understand his mandarin he tried speaking louder and more slowly! hehe ... then he kept motioning to my shirt and giving me the thumbs up ...
“you like my shirt?”
“shirt, shirt!” he exclaimed, excitedly
finally, a connection! “thank you!” i said, and gave him the thumbs up ... i like my green Aqueduct shirt too ...
... the next thing i knew he had driven us to a silk shirt factory! apparently they get a commission for bringing in tourists ...

diary of a microserf ...

my client hasn’t given me internet access, so i’ve taken to re-reading a digital copy of Microserfs while my students do their exercises. it was one of the first books i read for pleasure, this in my final year of university! (childhood excluded, of course ... my mom is a teacher!) i didn’t read earlier because i associated books with schoolwork ... if i picked one up i would think to myself “you should be reading your textbook!”

so, in the spirit of Microserfs,

if my life was a game of jeopardy! my seven dream categories would be:
- music of the 90s & 00s
- good cheap food
- anxiety 101
- financial planning 102
- getting by doing minimal work
- “many highs, many methods”
- lighting solutions for the good host

the author introduces his characters this way, and it’s funny how much you can learn about a person from their seven dream categories. what would yours be?

eerie silence...

arriving for work this morning was SUREAL! my taxi dropped me off by the ‘east gate’ of the building ... there was no one there. i walked half a kilometre to the main gate ... a guard! i tried to tell him why i was there, but he simply opened the gate. i walked through. the front of the building was completely deserted ... five football fields of concrete in front of a huge building, but no signs of life; no cars, nothing.
silence.
i approached the one door to the building ... it was open. i entered .... a large, spartan reception area ... a single guard ... silence. i said ‘hello’. he shook his head ... no English here! i showed him a piece of paper with my contact Hsaing Chen’s name on it. he picked up the phone behind his desk, spoke for a while, chuckled, and motioned for me to take a seat.
silence.
a cleaning lady entered and started cleaning around me ... silently. after a few minutes the phone beside me on the couch rang. the security guard came over and answered it, spoke for a moment, and hung up.
more silence.
eventually, a woman arrived, spoke with the security guard briefly, and approached me. i shook her hand, which seemed to surprise her. she motioned that she would like to see my piece of paper. i showed it to her. she pointed to the phone number beside Hsaing Chen’s name and gave me a quizzical look. i returned the sentiment. she picked up the phone, dialled the number, and started speaking with someone. she handed me the phone.
“hello?”
“hello”
“i’m here for the SAP training”
“oh ... okay. pass the phone to the guard.”
[more talking]
[the woman leaves]
she came back a minute later and motioned for me to follow her through a door. she led me through an empty office; then an empty production facility; then an empty corridor. finally, she opened a door that said ‘Training Room’, turned on the light, and left me there .... alone .... again, in silence.
finally my students began arriving, the first group asking puzzled ‘how did you get in here?’

atonement ...

i recently finished Atonement by Ian McEwan. It was a wonderful read, my favourite of McEwan's thus far, and i would suggest it to anyone who enjoys delving into the minds and hearts of a novel's characters ...

"... how can a novelist achieve atonement when, with her absolute power of deciding outcomes, she is also god? There is no one, no entity or higher form that she can appeal to, or be reconciled with, or that can forgive her. There is nothing outside her. In her imagination she has set the limits and the terms. No atonement for god, or novelists, even if they are atheists. It was always an impossible task, and that was precisely the point. The atempt was all."

tiger hill ...

china daze i ...

on my first day in Suzhou, i walked around and explored the sites nearest my hotel. my first impression was "wow, look at this infrastructure!" newly paved tree-lined streets, a separate lane for bikes and scooters, and sidewalks and street lamps full of character ...



my next impression was "wow, it's impossible to find anything here if you don't read mandarin!" i was trying to find the "Changlang Pavilion". the concierge at my hotel had given me the basic directions, but once i arrived in the area i had no idea where to go. now, i'm used to being in foreign countries and dealing with other languages, but what i haven't dealt with is a completely different alphabet! in a western country i would simply look for the building that said something like "Changlang" ... but here, "Changlang" is represented by three chinese characters (best described as "a T talking to a J", "a man standing beside a cross with a box on it", and "a big-ass storm approaching my house from the northwest"!! ;) so, while trying to find this place, i mistakenly walked into a public park (lovely, but not it), a private compound of some kind (a woman in uniform promptly whisked me away), and, of all things, a large karaoke bar. d'oh! i finally found it, and it was beautiful:




next was a lovely chinese garden, "the master of nets garden". i was even lucky enough to overhear (and inconspicuously follow) a french tour guide for the last half of his tour, and an english tour guide for the first half of his:

braintoy aren't tools ...

my buddy's band braintoy were recently interviewed by Chart magazine ... here's the article:

Braintoy Aren't Tools
Tuesday August 16, 2005

Mowing 'em down with their heavy, energetic art-rock, Toronto-based foursome Braintoy (Brett Fitzgerald, Devin Gasteiger, Riley O'Connor, and Christian Anderson) have taken Southern Ontario and the Northeastern United States by storm as they tour their latest EP, Tremors.

"We feel the glass is half full," beams Fitzgerald, discussing the tour and future plans. "We love it. We wouldn't do anything else. (The tour) has been a blast so far. Once the stars align and world domination is complete, we'll get back to our work on chaotic theories of fractal mathematics and baking shortbread in shapes of anatomically well-endowed snowmen. But you knew that, didn't you?"

Oh yeah, we forgot to tell you that they're also a bunch of friggin' smart-asses. Art-rock tends to bring that out of people except for when you ask the band if people might instantly shrug them off as Tool imitators. They don't dig that so much.

"At first, when you asked us this, I wanted to put together a nice statement that told you how different and unique we are from all the heavy art-rock that exists in the world," he grunts. "We are influenced by world music, classic rock and a few western bands of today, but I don't think we wear it on our sleeves. However, contexts are important and in that light, we find the comparisons complimentary."

Obviously something they've dealt with before, Braintoy truly do stand apart from the progressive art-rock norm with a hungrier sound and far more subtleties and inflections of music outside of the 4/4 guitar/bass/drums realm. Taking the moment to defend Braintoy's musical differences from Maynard and crew, Fitzgerald points out the delicate subtleties his band have to offer.

"We'd like to think we offer a little personality to the aforementioned 'sound' by blending vocal melody with progressive rhythms. We're also offering bribes (and) soon we'll be offering 'protection…' Hopefully, we can continue to avoid complacency. If that doesn't work out, crutches."

censorship?!

i just arrived in china. my impressions so far are few, but i'll share them with you:

- the behaviour of the chinese, in my culture, could be classified as "rude". my travel agent somehow had me on a small chinese carrier, so i was the only non-chinese person on the planes (yes, she also made me transfer in Xaimen ... and delivered my ticket to me less than 12 hours before i departed toronto ... but i digress ...) i had an aisle seat, and to my excitement i was seated between two buddhists, at least one of whom was obviously a monk (i think the other was as well, but his clothing was more peasant-like.) well, in an aisle seat i realized that the chinese don't have much of a problem invading the personal space of others. i was half-sat-on multiple times, hit (hard!) with various pieces of luggage, and at one point literally punched in the nose, ALL without apology or inquiry as to my well-being. i tried to withhold judgement ... it's a cultural thing, right?! then during the meal (this in business class) two men behind me had a belching contest. and when each plane landed, i seemed to be the only one that recognized deplaning etiquette ... in fact, i had to ENFORCE it by blocking the aisle (and the belchers) as the people in my row "exited" (i could say "shoved past me", but that would deflate my sense of heroism ;) okay, enough complaining ... i mean, look at this snack they gave me, and what a (wierd! but) nice sentiment:



... awww! ... but then i saw what it was:



... and where i come from, THAT ain't respect!! LOL

- from what i have seen, the economy here is growing at a feverish pace! on my drive from Shanghai to Suzhou, i literally saw THOUSANDS of new condos being built, along with the modern infrastructure to support them. the centralized planning astounded me aswell: a hundred of the same apartment building on one block, then a thousand of the same house on the next block, and so on. and something strange that i noticed from the air: many (say, 25%) of the roofs here are blue! (from high in the air i thought "wow, lots of pools") heh

- and lastly, the reason for the title of this post: i have broadband internet access from my hotel room, but i can't read any blogs on this site! (and yet i can post) censorship? someone on blogspot pissed off the chinese government perhaps? i'll see if i have the same problem from work next week ...

alrighty, time to start my day ... and figure out how to explore a city where no one seems to speak engligh (it took me a couple of seconds to realize that the receptionist was saying "hello, mr. walker" as i arrived ... oops!) ciao my loves ...

pagoda me ...

so how’s about a real update? (now that i’ve had some fun!)
saturday was great!! i hired a driver for the day and he took me to all of the major sites on the island.
first were two buddhist temples –one burmese, the other thai. the first was very peaceful and a wonderful start to my day ... beautiful statues everywhere, the sound of monks chanting in the background, and an interesting series of paintings depicting the life of “the” buddha.


the second was kitch ... a huge buddha laying on his side (“the third-largest reclining buddha in the world”, no less!), and places to give monetary ‘offerings’ in return for financial prosperity and sucess ... not what buddhism is about, imho.
after a brief drive around some other sites (an old british fort ... “yeah, we have a few of those too”), we stopped at Snake Temple. now this was interesting: a buddhist temple full of venemous snakes who are kept docile by incense. a bit of a tourist trap, but i got some great pics and a video of five snakes crawling over my body as i laughed nervously ...
the next stop was cool; a kind of zoo where i got to feed 160-year-old giant turtles. i also found a friend in a white parrot that liked to say ‘hello’ and dance for me ... in return for some neck rubs, that is! so cute!!


next was Kek Lok See. now, all week long my class had asked me when i was going to “Kellogg Sea”? ... “Galaxy”?? ... “Quay Looksie”??? ... i just smiled and said “maybe this weekend?” hehe. but it was beautiful! a huge buddhist monastery built on the side of hill, featuring a 120-foot-tall buddha (i prefer my buddha standing, thankyouverymuch!) a large pagoda, and many other beautiful structures.


next we drove to the north of the island. on the way, my driver stopped at the side of the road and as we got out of the car dozens of wild monkeys started walking towards us!! “they know me”, he said as he took out two large bags of peanuts so we could feed them! amazing!! they came right up to us and took the peanuts from our hands, staring into our eyes the entire time to judge our intentions. a few of them had baby monkeys clinging to their undersides aswell ... adorable!!!


a little further on we stopped again at the side of the road. more monkeys! 8(D) these guys were much more wary of humans (the first group lived near the botanical gardens and so were used to the attention.) they prefered bread to peanuts (i have no idea how my driver knew this) so we threw bread-ends to them like frisbees and they showed acrobatics in catching them ...

(to be continued ...)

where am i, exactly?

"Penang", says the dragon! ;)
(click to enlarge)

malaysian food ...

each morning and afternoon my students and i eat together, and i am told that the food we receive is typical of the national diet:

our breakfast spread always includes a spicy noodle dish as the main course, and lots of little sweet cakes for dessert. these cakes are funny, actually ... they come in myriad florescent colours and are made of glutinous rice flour (so they have a VERY strange consistency ... imagine starchy gelatin ... in florescent pink!!)


lunch invariably includes a wide range of protein options: curried chicken, spicy shrimp, spicy squid, fried fish, and an array of indian-style vegetarian dishes, all served over rice. dessert is comprised of various fresh fruits, most of which i have never heard of.

i have been eating dinner at places near my hotel, and my Costa Rican buddies and I usually revert to 'western' food. i have noticed, however, that curried fish heads and shark fin (either in soup or braised) are quite popular with the locals ...

malaysian ethnicity, religion, and language ...

before coming here, i couldn't picture what a 'typical' Malaysian person looked like ... and i was right! it really is a mish-mash:

Ethnic Origin: 50% Malay, 33% Chinese, 9% Indian, 2% indigenous tribes ...
Religion: 52% Muslim, 17% Buddhist, 12% Taoist, 8% Christian, 8% Hindu, 2% tribal ...

in general, the ethnic groups send their children to separate primary schools (Chinese children study in Mandarin, Indians in Tamil, etc.) then for high school, the cultures unite and they study in Malay and English. in my classroom, if two Chinese people are speaking they will converse in Mandarin ... if a Malay enters the conversation they automatically switch to English ...

ten years that changed the world ...

the latest issue of Wired magazine does a great job of putting the ten-year-old "internet revolution" in perspective ...

fun facts about malaysia ...

• the standard cutlery used during a meal is a spoon and a fork ... you eat everything with your spoon and use it to cut ... the fork is for holding your food in place during cutting and for pushing food onto your spoon
• there are english signs everywhere, but everything is spelled phonetically ... so you can take a skuter or a teksi to the farmasi at the shopping kompeks
• the malay word for "water" is "air" ... so every time i check the label on what i'm eating the first ingredient is air!
• all of the electrical outlets have little on/off switches
• they drive on the left and are part of the british commonwealth ... who knew?!
  

this diorama drama ...

situation comedies
and serial dramas
dislocated priorities
emotional dioramas
seen through the peep-hole
not birds-eye but fish
life swims free fore ward
rememories kissed
by playlist emotion
love befriended away
state sanctioned by no-one
is no-place to stay

so i grew a beard